I was pleasantly surprised this morning when Scott opened my car door and handed me a rose saying, "Happy Eleven Months!" I had completely forgotten. This whole past weekend I was confined to coughing on the couch. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to live in a mainly warm climate all the time--I would probably be sick a lot less. But I know I'd miss seeing my breath and wearing cozy scarves, boots, and coats and catching snowflakes on my tongue.
The rose today reminded me of Angela and Hodgins from 'Bones.' God, how I love this show. I have mad love for all the characters but I have a strange affinity towards Angela, especially her relationship with Hodgins. One time Brennan states: "Technically all of us are geniuses...besides Angela." Angela just looks down and smiles at Brennan's inability to be anything less than literal.
Angela is funky, open-minded, a little bit taller than Hodgins, which I find endearing, and understanding. On Valentine's Day, Angela tells Hodgins not to get her anything because they're married and married people 'don't have to do that stuff.' The rest of the lab tells Hodgins that just because he and Angie are married doesn't mean he can skip being romantic. He ends up giving her a mold spliced with a rose...giving it a rosy scent--named Angelicus Montenegrus. Angela is thrilled.
And I just wished that I could be like that. Thrilled with mold. And then Scott brought me that rose today and it was just like Hodgins-- minus the mold.
Sometimes I wonder why I fear marriage so much. I guess it's just because I believe marriage to be forever. When I get married, I want it to be forever. I see people my age getting engaged, married, having babies and I just feel too immature to handle that right now. So how can they be juggling it all? I'm almost afraid I'll get married too late in life. I haven't lived on my own yet. How can I live with another person for the rest of my life?
I've been giving my future some thought lately--mainly because I should be filling out grad school applications. I plan on applying to UofL, UK, and IU indefinitely. They are the closest to me and with my GRE scores and GPA I'm likely to get in. Out of the three, I think I'd prefer IU the most because it's the strongest English program and ranked #19 in the country. Plus, I'm sure my parents would be more apt to have me move to Bloomington than say, New York City.
I also want to apply to some long-shot school like NYU, perhaps Columbia, and London. I really think my decision will be based on what each school has to offer me. If one school will give me tuition reimbursement over another and it's further away, I'm going to have to go with that one. I've never really been away from my parents and I thought grad school would be the best time to do it. But thinking about it, how lonely would I be in New York or London? I'm sure it would one of the greatest experiences and I would grow into it, but is that really what I need? My emotions have been hard enough to handle with a secure support group around me. I'd hate to leave that behind. :(
Keep taking that Vitamin C, ya'll. It's going to be a long cold/flu season. I can feel it.
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ReplyDeleteI'd hate if you left your support group behind too :(, but I guess you got to do what you got to do it comes down to it
ReplyDeleteI don't think I want to leave.
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